


The Drowning of Silence

by KilledStars



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mind Reading, Minor Angst, Otabek is also precious, Victor and Yuuri and best dads, Yuri growing up, Yuri is precious, Yuri needs all the hugs, i can't tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-17
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-09-09 05:26:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8877691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KilledStars/pseuds/KilledStars
Summary: As long as Yuri could remember, he could hear someone's thoughts by touching them. He'd known he was the only one like this from a young age. It terrified him. It's was easy for Yuri to throw all of himself into ice skating and forget, even if only for a while, that he was the broken child of fate. The voices never seemed to end, and it made the world seem dark and ugly. Tainted, even.
Yuri had always preferred the silence.
Until he met Otabek. Then suddenly, silence was the last thing he wanted.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhhhhhh
> 
> I have no idea what I was on when I wrote this (about 10 hours of no sleep and the pressure of up coming finals :) yeah) but here you go.
> 
> Otabek and Yuri is sweetest ship - EVEN IF PEOPLE ONLY SHIP THEIR FRIENDSHIP ITS SO WHOLESOME AND AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

Yuri had always prefered the silence.

 

It was fate, the cruel mistress, that had never allowed Yuri to have what he desired. Unless Yuri was also surrounded by loneliness, the betrothed of silence. Although Yuri yearned quite often for silence’s hand, he never once had sought for her lover’s as well. Yuri did not enjoy loneliness.

As long as Yuri could remember, his world never was truly silent. Perhaps words were not spoken, but their minds had screamed. All it took was the briefest of contacts, not even skin to skin, for Yuri to hear them. Yuri didn’t remember a day where he couldn’t do this. When his Grandfather was sad, Yuri simply had to hug him for an answer. Mostly, it was about Grandma. Yuri didn’t remember her well, besides of how lovely she had always been within Grandpa’s mind. Faintly, Yuri wondered if she had known how highly Grandpa had thought of her.

Many would have considered Yuri a blessing. Perhaps a higher being, even. But Yuri never felt like he was truly better than anyone with his gift. Yuri learned young he was the only person able to hear other’s thoughts, that they knew of, and he didn’t want to be the odd one out. So Yuri never told anyone, not even his Grandpa. Yuri loved him, but he was a chatterbox, and it would surely slip.

The mind, as Yuri had figured out, was dark. While one may speak of the joy and cheer within their lives, the mind held other stories. The true stories. Once, on a crowded train, Yuri had listened to a woman talk on and on about how her husband was so kind and caring. But all it took was the brush of shoulders for his mind to be filled with images of bruises and fists. Yeah, Yuri couldn’t be blamed for learning to hate the human mind, and for never being one to trust what people said.

“Yuri, there’s a figure skating contest coming up. Would you like to go see it with me?” Grandpa had said while Yuri was working on his math homework.

Yuri looked up at his Grandpa. The man was looking at him with expectant eyes. Yuri let out a small huff and faked a stretch, bumping his Grandpa with small hands. _She loved skating_ , Yuri heard in his usually gruff voice. Yuri sighed and nodded, which made his Grandpa’s face light up with excitement.

Two weeks later, Yuri found himself at a cold rink in a cold winter. The lights faintly dimmed with towering figures all around small, seven year old Yuri. He had to grip his Grandpa’s coat for a guide to their seats. Thankfully, they were in the very first rows or so. It had been so long since that day, Yuri couldn’t quite remember it exactly.

But Yuri remembers the skaters. At such a young age, Yuri had no idea what the words over the intercom had meant. All Yuri knew was that he _knew_ the stories. As the man with a white, angelic like suit twisted in the air, Yuri could see it. He didn’t need his powers for it. It was the story of an unfortunate soul, damned for no reason at all. As the angels that watched him fought, the demons retaliated. The blankness of the world was engulfing him. And finally, a love had come, and vanquished both sides.

Yuri knew that it was the answer to his prayers. Something beautiful he could lose himself to, even at the age of seven. In the mind of adults, Yuri had learned too many things for a boy his age. It was a cruel place, the world, and no matter what, it never wanted to walk side by side with Yuri.

Yuri told his Grandpa his over the shouting, who looked down at him with a shocked expression. Of course, Yuri skipped over the mind-reading part. His Grandpa gave him a soft smile and shouted back, “If that’s you want, Yuri!”

It didn’t take long for Yuri to be lost to ice skating. It was easy to throw all of himself into the sport, instead of listening to the world around. _A world of lies,_ Yuri would find himself bitterly snapping within his mind. His heart pumping along the ice made him forget anything and everything around him. The years passed, and Yuri still found the silence of the coldness to be a comfort.

Yuri had totally given his being to ice skating, but still, ballet was essential to more skaters. Yuri would agree there was still the sense of beauty and story, but not the same as the thrill of flying without wings.There was no thin line keeping yourself from falling, no chill to bite at your features as your lungs screamed for air.

Yuri was not bad at ballet either. He was very nimble, able to stretch himself better than most the others in his group, even the older boys. Most of them teased Yuri for his feminine looks, but Yuri knew so much by a simple touch. The most frequent of them, some kid from America, was scared for his dying Grandmother back home with the same hair color. It had only took Yuri to whisper her name for him to stop. Eventually, none of his group would talk with him much.

“Yuri, help Otabek with his moves, yes?” The instructor chimed, looking at Yuri and pointing to perhaps the oldest kid.

Yuri knew faintly who Otabek was. Some fifteen year old from Kazakhstan, who wasn’t all that great at ballet. He knew Otabek was a skater, but probably not that great of one, if he couldn’t even get ballet right. _The sooner I do this, the quicker it’s over._ Yuri mentally sighed and made his way to Otabek.

The teen was glaring at him, which Yuri assumed what his naturally facial state, and took no offence or intimidation from it. “Show me,” Yuri barked, glaring back.

Otabek took no hesitation with attempting their lesson. Yuri quickly pinpointed the mistake within his stance and moved to correct it. Upon touching Otabek’s leg, the soft yet deeper voice, one that Yuri didn’t think could belong to simply a teen, filled his thoughts. Yuri would have pushed it away, but the words caught in his mind.

_He’s beautiful._

Yuri blinked in a shocked silence. Objectively, Yuri knew he was beautiful. His mother had graced him with her features. But Otabek wasn’t speaking objectively. Over the years, Yuri learned to differentiate them. Otabek thought he was figuratively beautiful. It scared Yuri, because no one had thought of him like that. Yuri knew that it was essentially the point of being a figure skater, but even still. He wasn’t sure anyone _should_ think of him like that. After all, Yuri was the broken child of fate.

After the group had graduated, Yuri forced himself to forget the boy with a dulcet dark voice and thick eyebrows. Friends were not something Yuri wanted nor needed. He was thirteen, he had never had one before, and was just fine. _You aren’t normal_ , his mind would remind him, _you don’t need normal things._

Yuri chanted that to himself all the way to his Junior Championship. Yuri had breezed through him with the prospect of knowing that Viktor Nikiforov, perhaps the best skater in the Senior Division, would help him with his debut. Even after the banquet and the living embarrassment that was Yuuri Katsuki, Yuri was on the high of his victory. He would make his debut next season, and the world would know his name.

So when the next season rolls around, and Viktor doesn’t hold up his promise, Yuri is rightfully mad. Yuri tracks down Viktor to the _other_ Yuuri, the human manifestation of bad drinking choices, and confronts him about it. Which then boils down a childish fight for a promise that had been rightfully Yuri’s. After Yuri trains and trains his routine, it takes but a glance at Viktor on the day of the battle for Yuri to know that he has lost. He doesn’t even need the touch to confirm it, but Yuri knows he’s a bit of masochist. He lets himself swipe a hand across Viktor softly and hears the distinct Russian in his brain. _Yuuri is beautiful._

That’s all he needs to walk out of the building without looking back.

Even with Viktor off playing coach with Yuuri, Yuri is determined to win the gold medal. To validate that all the running he’s done from himself was worth it. _After skating, then you’re allowed to collapse in on your own mind, Yuri._

Yuri instantly learns that he _hates_ the Canadian asshat who can’t seem to realize that Yuri does not want to talk with other people. Their first encounter, JJ decided that it would be perfectly fine for him to just sling an arm over Yuri. The large amount of contact flooded Yuri with many, many images and thoughts. The one that stood out most was a small black box hidden in his bag, followed by the image of a young woman his age with black hair and attractive features. _Oh,_ Yuri thinks, _he’s planning to propose after winning gold._

Yuri shoved JJ away quickly and sped off to his own area. The later did not pursue Yuri, but still made it a point to annoy him any chance he could. So the time first time Yuri loses to the bastard, he’s pissed. When Yuri got back to the hotel, he gracefully threw himself face down on his bed and screamed into his pillow.

Yuri wasn’t sure how long it had taken for them to cross paths again, but Yuri wants nothing with the older Russian and his puppy. Later, when Yuri learns that Viktor’s actually puppy was in critical condition, Yuri feels himself soften. Yuri had remembered once, when Viktor was handing him some drink, the image of his dog at home, curled up on the couch. His mind was filled with such love for the creature, and Yuri knew how he felt. Yuri was the same with his own cat.

Sometime that night he finds Yuuri outside in the cold. He looks pretty down, and Yuri is not content with having the competition not at their fullest. He nudges Yuuri with his foot a bit and the sadness of his words cut him. _I hope Makkachin is fine._ _I still remember when my dog died. I wasn’t even there to say goodbye._ Yuri feels a bit sorry for Yuuri. So, he throws Yuuri his food (his _favorite_ food, mind you) that his Grandpa made. Yuri feels a sense of pride when Yuuri eats some and praises his Grandpa.

The Grand Prix final rolls in, and along with it the 6 finalist. Everyone had a day before the finals, so they all relaxed in their own way. Yuri had barely gotten out of his hotel before fangirls quickly swarmed in on him, forcing Yuri to run into a side alley. His plan had been to tail Viktor and Yuuri, but they had somehow evaded him on accident. So, here he was, crammed in a dirt alley way hiding from almost animalistic fans.

The quiet radiating from his spot was quickly killed by the rumbling of what sounded like an engine. Yuri glances up to see a helmeted figure with a jacket on. It gives off an odd sense of recognition, but Yuri can’t place a name to the figure. The man takes off his sunglasses and looks at Yuri for a second. It clicks in Yuri’s mind that he’s Otabek Altin, a rival for gold in the Grand Prix Finale. “Yuri, get on,” He says demandingly, tossing him a helmet.

Yuri mulls over the voice, wondering where he had heard such a thing. He doesn’t receive much time before he hears the fangirls nearing them. Quickly, Yuri jumps on the back of the motorcycle. Even less than that for Yuri to light wrap his arms around the body in front of him.

_He’s even more beautiful._

The thought confused Yuri briefly until Otabek takes a sharp corner, causing Yuri to panic and wrap himself tighter around Otabek. The later, oddly, starts to think about startled kittens with an amused track of mind. Yuri can’t help but laugh a bit too when the velvety voice goes _meow._

Otabek takes them to some railing where they can over look the sunset. It’s there that Otabek confesses about their younger selves and how he basically had always thought that Yuri had been cool and even beautiful (although Yuri doesn’t learn that part until they’re in the cafe).

They made friends quickly and Yuri learned that he genuinely loved Otabek’s personality. Sure, he was shy and reserved, but his mind was constantly active. When asked about something, Otabek would almost never lie, unless he was certain it would hurt their feeling too much. Other than that, Otabek was very honest. Yuri made sure to cheer Otabek on during his skating, even if Yuri wanted that gold too. Otabek in turn cheered for Yuri too.

At the end of the Grand Prix Final, Yuuri had been the winner. Yuri had taken silver, and Phichit with bronze. Otabek had been a very close fourth. After, at the banquet (and everyone made sure Yuuri had nothing to drink - much to Chris’ disappointment), Yuuri and Viktor made their relationship public and everyone freaked out. Yuri didn’t need his powers to know what everyone was thinking - what happens next for them? Sadly, they don’t get any answers.

Shortly after their announcement, Yuri catches them making heart eyes at each other. Yuri goes to sarcastically elbow Otabek, but instead, he just gets a fleeting thought. _He was so close to gold._

Yuri blinked up at Otabek with a confused face. Yeah, he was upset for not winning, everyone was. Yuri was confused as to why Otabek was sad about Yuri not winning gold. _Well,_ his conscious supplies, _you are friends._ Yuri smiles to himself. Otabek gives him a small smile back.

_Friends. I like the sound of that._

XxxxX

 

“Bbbbeeekkkkaaa,” Yuri whines, looking up at Otabek from his stop between his legs on the floor.

“Yuri, you’re nineteen, act like it,” Otabek retorts. _He’s nineteen, how dare he still be adorable._

“I know you don’t mean it, you think I’m adorable. You’re just salty because I beat you in karaoke,” Yuri teased from his spot, ignoring the movie playing in the background.

_That’s stupid,_ Yuri hears Otabek think, not quite directed at him. “What?” Yuri asks.

“This movie. The whole ‘mind-reading’ thing the main character can do,” Otabek huffs, dropping his chin on Yuri’s head.

“Why do you think it’s stupid?!” Yuri bites back, feeling offended.

Otabek eyes him oddly and furrows his brows. “I don’t think anyone could handle hearing everyone’s thoughts all the time. It seems like they’d explode or something. Or just really hate life.”

“Yeah, well, what if I told you that _I_ could read minds?” Yuri purrs, not quite thinking of his words.

The sudden realization of what he had just said hit him. Quickly, he glanced up at Otabek with wide eyes. Otabek was just smiling at him fondly with an amused expression. “Sure you can, Yuri,” Otabek returned.

Yuri considers tell him for a second. Otabek is his best friend, has been for years. He tells Otabek everything and vise versa. Yuri sighs. With how much he’s hoarded all of Otabek to himself, that soothing of his voice, Yuri figures he owes Otabek at least this much. “You can’t tell anyone, Otabek.”

Otabek raises an eyebrow at Yuri. “Yuri, I know you can’t actually read minds.” _No one can._

"One person can.”

“Yuri, this is like that time you tried on convice me that in Russia your greeting method was doing the worm.” _Viktor still has it on camera, you do too probably._

“No he doesn’t. I made Viktor delete the video. But yeah, I do still have it,” Yuri grinned up at Otabek.

Otabek gapped at Yuri. He was stunned by Yuri it seemed. _Shit, I went too far, didn’t I?_ Yuri thinks.

“Tell me what I’m thinking!” Otabek hastily shouted out.

_Sharks_ _usually eat with forks._

“Otabek, what the fuck does ‘Sharks usually eat with forks’ even _mean_?” Yuri answers.

Otabek stares at Yuri for a good whole minute because leaping up and letting out a strangled scream. Yuri just gives him a concerned look. Otabek then proceeds to throw himself on his bed and cover his head with his pillow.

“Otabek?” Yuri rushed over to the bed and tried to move the pillow from Otabek’s face.

“My best friend can read fucking _minds_ ,” Otabek says airly.

“It’s not that big a deal, Otabek. Most people are assholes in their minds anyways,” Yuri tried to supply humor, but Otabek just grumbled more.

_How much does he know? Oh god, he_ has _to know._ “Know what, Otabek?” That doesn’t help either.

Otabek sits up swiftly and throws the pillow. Yuri follows its trail before turning back to Otabek, who’s staring intensely at him. Otabek grabs him by the shoulders and forces him to sit down on the bed. “You can read minds, Yuri, you know what I mean,” Otabek huffs, almost looking betrayed.

_You know that I really want to cuddle you and hug you and give you tiny little kisses like the dork I am._ Yuri stares at Otabek for a second, a blush creeping up onto his face. “I, uh, I can say I definitely didn’t know that,” Yuri stutters out, which makes Otabek blush to, “It really only works if I’m touching someone,” Yuri fills in, gesturing at Otabek’s hands on his shoulders.

Otabek takes his own hands back and proceeds to bury his face into his palms. Yuri chuckles a bit at seeing Otabek so flustered. “Don’t worry, Otabek. I can’t exactly lie and say I would hate it if you did that.”

The dark haired man looked up at Yuri over his hands, processing what Yuri had just said. The realization slowly bloomed on Otabek’s face, which made Yuri smile fondly at him. “Wait-” “Oh boy, I’m hungry. I’m gonna go grab a drink, Otabek!” Yuri’s smile transformed into a grin as Yuri stood up and booked it for the kitchen.

It didn’t take long for Otabek to snap out of his trance and chase after Yuri, the mind-reading temporarily forgotten. Yuri didn’t care much if Otabek cared or not about his power. Yuri could tell how much Otabek cared about him even without it.

Later, when Viktor and Yuuri burst into Otabek’s apartment, looking for Yuri, and catch them making out in the kitchen. Yuri was pressed up against the counter and Otabek was running his hand through his long hair. Viktor lets out a sarcastic gasp and Yuri flips the married couple off. Otabek, of course, carries on like nothing had even happened and offers them something to drink. Somewhere in that time Otabek had taken Yuri’s hand. While Viktor was dramatically talking to Yuri about ‘their precious son’ and how Otabek had to ‘meet their standards’, Otabek just looked over at Yuri. _We can finish that later, after your Dads chew me out._

Yuri lets out a snort, catching the ‘dads’ off guard. Yuri returns the look with Otabek, giving him his best ‘ _of course, Otabek’_ glance. It seems to work, because Otabek smiles back.

   

XxxxX

   

Yuri had always prefered the silence.

Fate, the cruel mistress, had never given Yuri what he wanted. Instead, fate had cursed him to have the exact opposite. For the longest time, Yuri believed that. He had even chanted in his mind ‘ _I’m not normal, I don’t need normal things’._

However, fate worked in both cruel and compassionate ways. For in a world where most thoughts were ugly, tainted, Fate gave him something to hate the silence for. Otabek Altin. Because the silence now meant that when Yuri wakes up, Otabek is already in the shower or out on a morning jog. Or that their cats, Lev and Ina, weren’t meowing for attention like usual. The silence meant Viktor and Yuuri weren’t visiting from Japan and doing their usual concerned dads thing, as much as Yuri may hate it. The silence meant that Otabek wasn’t nearby, because for as quiet and shy as he was, Otabek was a touchy person, and his mind was always racing. It meant that Yuri couldn’t be hearing Otabek’s sly remarks about the baristas at their favorite cafe, his Grandpa’s kitchen sizzling when making his favorite food, the clanking of skates against ice, Otabek’s parents telling stories about baby Otabek, or the rumble of a motorcycle when they go for a ride and just lose themselves to each other.

So maybe, once, Yuri had prefered the silence. But that was in the past. Now, the silence was drowning, and Yuri had finally learned how to swim.

**Author's Note:**

> I dunno I tried to be all poetic because I was pissed about to being let into Honors English but oh well. I didn't raise my grade to an A until like last minute sooooo I kind of deserve it. Hope you enjoyed and I'm tired as fuck so sorry for any errors.


End file.
